I first read Rami Shapiro's The Sacred Art of Lovingkindness: Preparing to Practice a couple years ago, and it is one of those books revisited again and again. His reflections and the practices for application hold much beauty.
In his chapter titled Fearless Compassion, he declares:
I don't think lovingkindness is about being nice. I believe it's about being fearless. When the Dalai Lama affirms the religion of kindness, he is talking about a religious attitude that mirrors the truth without distortion. The greatest kindness one can offer another is compassionate honesty. That is to say, to allow the other to see the consequences of her actions without imposing any judgments or prejudices of your own. It is this seeing that transforms the seer (Shapiro, 2008, p. 20).
As I take in this wisdom, I understand deeply how one must be "fearless," must have courage in speaking their truth, a truth, openly and honestly. It is so deeply loving because it means that one cares enough to be vulnerable and trusts the person(s) with whom he/she shares. The sad reality is that sometimes people cannot receive, engage, or hold another's truth. And, some people retreat to a false notion of "being nice" (not saying anything and/or saying what they believe another wants to hear). Being loving, being kind, to yourself and to others, means having Fearless Compassion.
May we learn to share our truths respectfully and when we receive them from others, may we cradle them in compassionate care. A simple-but not easy- act that has the power to foster relational trust and add to a world of understanding, tending and befriending the differences in ideas and ways of being in our world.
In his chapter titled Fearless Compassion, he declares:
I don't think lovingkindness is about being nice. I believe it's about being fearless. When the Dalai Lama affirms the religion of kindness, he is talking about a religious attitude that mirrors the truth without distortion. The greatest kindness one can offer another is compassionate honesty. That is to say, to allow the other to see the consequences of her actions without imposing any judgments or prejudices of your own. It is this seeing that transforms the seer (Shapiro, 2008, p. 20).
As I take in this wisdom, I understand deeply how one must be "fearless," must have courage in speaking their truth, a truth, openly and honestly. It is so deeply loving because it means that one cares enough to be vulnerable and trusts the person(s) with whom he/she shares. The sad reality is that sometimes people cannot receive, engage, or hold another's truth. And, some people retreat to a false notion of "being nice" (not saying anything and/or saying what they believe another wants to hear). Being loving, being kind, to yourself and to others, means having Fearless Compassion.
May we learn to share our truths respectfully and when we receive them from others, may we cradle them in compassionate care. A simple-but not easy- act that has the power to foster relational trust and add to a world of understanding, tending and befriending the differences in ideas and ways of being in our world.
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